Family view - Home Education: A Childhood Lesson
Kindly contributed by George
I believe your child's education should be based on having a choice and home education had always been a consideration when we started a family.
I was home educated for a time when I was a child. Unfortunately, because my mother was ill, I ended up being the carer not the cared for and didn’t receive education for the time I was de-schooled.
This experience meant I had conflicting feelings about the merits of home education. I didn’t want history to repeat itself. When I returned to school, I found it provided a release from the mayhem at home, a free school meal every day and a chance to get educated; to have a better future. At the time it was my closest link to normality and hope.
However, the lesson here is not to make decisions on the upbringing of your children based solely on your own experiences. I have learnt to be very individually minded about many things. What’s good for one is certainly not good for all.
All three of my children started at primary school. I chose this route because at the time I thought school would be better for them. I was very affected by my own history and had a deep-seated need for my children to have a normal childhood. Part of me was ingrained with the idea that school offered the best solution to education that our society had to offer. Qualified teachers know more about teaching and education than I possibly could - don’t they? So I went back to Veterinary Nursing for a while.
My oldest son hated school. Although it was a nice village school which encouraged parents to be pro-active and involved. He wasn’t bullied, the teachers seemed nice and put time and effort into helping him settle. My son couldn’t cope with the environment and was so tired at the end of each day. He became bored and described the school as a prison. He displayed increasing signs of distress and depression and would curl up into a ball, refusing to change into his school uniform. He would feign illness. He would sob desperately and I couldn’t and wouldn’t force him.
My son had many sick days per term and I discussed the problem with the head teacher, who advised me not to force him into the school. The teachers and assistants tried encouraging methods to coax my son and some worked for a while, but my son’s distress became worse. He would eat strange things to make himself poorly.
Finally one day we reached a climax and he threatened to starve himself rather than go back to school. As his appetite was already very low and his weight and height below average, I feared for his mental and physical health and well being.
Enough was enough. Finally, I opted for home education. At first I was incredibly anxious, but when I saw the relief and joy on my little boy’s face when as parents we agreed to give home education a chance, I knew it was absolutely the right decision. I have not looked back with any regret at all. I still get days when I lack the confidence in my abilities but never wish for anything different than having the children at home. It is a delightful and highly enriching experience.
I took my younger son out of school at the same time because I realised that it wasn’t the school that helped me make the decision. It was me, finally being able to bury the past and make the right choice for my children as a parent.
I am now in my fourth year of home educating all three of my kids and have had an inspection from an education officer once a year. All our reports have been great and encouraging. The children are happy, balanced, well educated and socialised. Although our story is individual to us, home education is a real option for parents and not a second or last resort if school doesn’t work. My children learn and thrive at home. Others learn and thrive at school or in some other educational establishment. We have a choice and so do our children. It is as much their right as it is ours.